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When someone asks you what kind of music you play, what do you tell them? I hate being asked that question and I've never found a standard two- or three-word answer that covers it. Here's a few really BAD answers:

  • "Heavy metal"
  • "Blues"

Suppose you asked Frank Zappa what kind of music he played, what do you suppose he'd say? Certainly not heavy metal or blues. If your music is so hopelessly trapped in a single genre that you can summarise it quickly and easily like that then you are doing something wrong. Or you're 14 years old. Which is pretty much the same thing.

Even worse, you may choose to say something like "speed metal" or "screamo".

Well newsflash motherfucker, those are not styles, those are names invented by advertising monkeys and PR men in suits who get jobs in record companies because they're too fucking talentless to play an instrument. Many self-proclaimed "musicians" seem to have swallowed this horseshit, mainly the ones who care more about their hairstyles than their lyrics and spend longer choosing an exfoliating skin product than they do choosing a guitar.